Weekend Writing Warriors – Bratty Little Sis

better-wewriwa

Summer is practically around the corner. For a taste of stories from diverse writers, head over to Weekend Writing Warriors. I’m continuing with The Burning Night. Apologies to those that are eager for more from Let Go, but I really want to keep going with this story.

In this excerpt, Ashley stops tickling Melissa. Ashley shows off how she loves “tormenting” her sister, and Melissa isn’t happy. This snippet has been modified to meet the new 8-10 sentence rule.

I could feel my cheeks flush as I tried to catch my breath. A sharp pain in my ribs followed, and I put one hand over my ribcage.

With a thrust-out chest, Ashley looked at me with one of those ‘gotcha’ expressions. “I, like, never get tired of that!”

“You little brat,” I glared at her, pushing my hair away from my face. That’s the problem with siblings – they know all your weaknesses. She revealed them to all my friends through Facebook, including my big fear of spiders. She even blabbed about my ticklish feet to Chris the first time I brought him home, and he took full advantage of it throughout our whole relationship.

Ashley shrugged with a smirk like the whole thing was no biggie, and every muscle started tensing in body.

I think Ashley’s gone too far, and it looks like we’re gonna see a cat-fight. Because Melissa will be going away to college, Ashley teases her as much as she can until then. That’s the way she is, but she really loves her sister and looks up to her as an idol. How she deals with her sister going away is actually a subplot to the story. Chris is Melissa’s ex-boyfriend, who cheated on her a week before the story begins. Makes you want to care for her more, huh? I’d love to hear your thoughts.

I’d like to wish a happy belated birthday to one of our Weekend Writing Warriors moderators – happy birthday Millie Burns! Thanks for everything that you do!

Happy Sunday everyone!

Categories: Weekend Writing Warriors | Tags: , , , , , , ,

Post navigation

22 thoughts on “Weekend Writing Warriors – Bratty Little Sis

  1. Ah, it’s cute how Ashley shows her caring through torturing her sis. 🙂 Poor Melissa has already been put through the wringer, it sounds like!

  2. Yup, methinks sissy’s going to get it. 😉 Great excerpt!

  3. What a brat. Right now I don’t like her but Frank, I do like your story. I had brothers. They thought of other wicked thing to do.

  4. Ah, sisters. They always drive you– and your characters– crazy. Great eight!

  5. Nice social media mention there. Great work, Whatever happened, did you decide to go with the editor or against it?

  6. My brother was a lot like that… tormented the hell out of me, and made life “positively traumatic” (at least I felt it was at the time) when I would come home from college and want to spend time with my boyfriends.

    That owwy rib though… Does that play further into the story? Does Ashley hate Chris with a passion too?

    • The rib hurting doesn’t play further, but Melissa’s feet are going to get it later in the story. And yes, Ashley now hates Chris

  7. Interesting dynamic between the two sisters and does set us up well for the events to come. Great snippet!

  8. Siblings – love them or hate them?

  9. siobhanmuir

    Siblings – can’t live with them, can’t kill them. 😉 Great snippet, Frank. 🙂

  10. Oh you captured the sibling dynamic perfectly! 🙂 Great eight, Frank!

  11. Playback is a… *ahem* mother. Ashley should watch it.

    • Ashley should watch it…but then again she’ll be getting hers when she endures the hot foot.

Blog at WordPress.com.

%d bloggers like this: