Weekend Writing Warriors/#8sunday – A Mother’s Advice

For a neat way to read snippets from a variety of authors, head over to Weekend Writing Warriors. You’ll find the list of participating authors, as well as guidelines if you want to participate yourself. Thanks for visiting my blog. I’m sharing a snippet from The Burning Night.

Set-up: Melissa’s mother visits her in her bedroom, where they are having a mother-daughter moment. Melissa is complaining about her father (they’ve been butting heads). Her mom offers her take on her husband, and she speaks first.

“Your father just doesn’t like the idea of you going to college so far away from home. He wishes you were going somewhere closer, like Syracuse. He thinks he can change your mind.”

Like that was going to happen.

“Just try to get along with him, it would be nice if we could have just one day without you two causing a war.”

I looked at her with a lowered brow. He needs to get along with me, Mom.

She shook her head slowly and said, “Look, after a good night’s sleep this place will feel like home. Whatever is bothering you about this house, it’s just all in your head…I know you all too well, sweetie.”

 She clutched my hands, warming them instantly – the kind of warmth only a mother’s touch could bring.

 

If you’re wondering, Melissa is going to go to college in California. I don’t think the weirdness of the house is in Melissa’s head. The conversation continues next week. Thanks for taking the time to read and comment on this snippet!

Enjoy your day!

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36 thoughts on “Weekend Writing Warriors/#8sunday – A Mother’s Advice

  1. Sometimes we don’t know our children like we think we do?

  2. Frank, this scene is wonderful. As a mom of many, you touched my heart.

    • Melissa going away to college is a subplot of the story. Even her sister has a take on it. Thanks!

  3. Having lived in/near Syracuse most of my life, I can totally understand a lot of reasons why Melissa would want to go to college in California, and none of those involve a creepy house–that’s just frosting.

    An interesting thing to me is how much you note how her mother’s touch is soothing and comforting… it’s almost creepy when it happens so often, especially since mom doesn’t see the danger in the house…..

    • Melissa is in love with the idea of California. It is creepy that her mother’s touch is soothing.

      • I knew it… Something’s a bit off about Mom.

      • You are right! Sometimes I can’t believe I’ve set her up like this.

      • Of course you can! You know the story… and you will do everything you have to to make the story work. Right?

    • Melissa really wants to go to California. She lives in Buffalo, and wants to get away from everything. At this point, no one seems to recognize potential danger. Melissa just has a bad feeling about it.

      • Ah… well, yeah… If you’ve been in Buffalo, of course Syracuse would give you a bad feeling. 😉

  4. Very touching scene, and makes an interesting dynamic. As comforting as her mother’s words are, I don’t think she sees the problem as clearly as Melissa does. Great work with the emotion! 🙂

  5. This is a very true-to-life conversation–and Melissa’s mother still isn’t listening to her . . . I’m beginning to have a weird feeling about that . . .

    I keep forgetting how old Melissa is–not that she’s out of character at all for an older teen–I think had it fixed in my head early that she was a bit younger. It’s probably Ashley’s fault! 😀

    • Melissa is eighteen. She’s stubborn and a bit immature. I think eighteen year-olds talk like this at times, but yes, Ashley brings out Melissa’s immaturity and anger.

  6. I admire how you get into a youngster’s POV so well.

  7. Strong snippet Frank, you paint a very realistic scene. Can’t wait to read more!

  8. That’s the problem when parents know their child is creative and imaginative. Anything creepy you experience is probably made up. Poor Melissa!

  9. Uh oh, Mom is sure wrong about this house! I enjoyed the scene between the two of them though, great character development.

  10. I hate when “you two need to get along” actually means “you, singular, need to keep your mouth shut.” Ah, well. Family!

    • Yes, Melissa’s mom is referring to Melissa needing to get along with her dad, but she is wrong. Family indeed.

  11. Her mother sounds sweet but maybe doesn’t see everything that is going on haha I love that she chose to go to California for college too. Great choice!

    • Melissa is infatuated with California for a lot of reasons and she is determined to go there no matter what..

  12. I can totally relate to this in a sense. Great snippet.

  13. chellecordero

    Mom is trying to comfort but I think it is a big mistake to dismiss her daughter’s concerns so easily.

  14. It’s all in her head, huh? We’ll see what happens with Melissa. Hopefully California will be good to her. Great snippet Frank.

  15. Oh wow…Knee jerk, I thought that mom needs to believe her daughter. After reading ll of the comments and then your replies, methinks it’s not really mom at all… Imposters??? 🙂

    Good snippet, Frank! Loads of intrigue. 🙂

    • Melissa’s mom isn’t in on what happens later on the story. She thinks her daughter is being a narrow-minded teen.

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