Weekend Writing Warriors/#8Sunday – Melissa Can’t Win

The first Weekend Writing Warriors of November is here. Click on the link to see how you can join us, or to see who else is participating today. I hope you all had a great Halloween, whether it was trick-or-treating with the kids, or a classic Halloween party. Time to look to Thanksgiving, Christmas and most of all NaNoWriMo. I’m offering a snippet from The Burning Night. This will be the last snippet I share from this story before moving on to a WIP.

In this scene, Melissa is arguing with her dad about staying at the country house. This is in Melissa’s POV and she is the first to speak:

“Why couldn’t you let me stay home? I’m eighteen!”

He looked up with his signature intimidating smile. “My teenage daughter…alone for three days in our house that’s worth three hundred thousand, hmmmm…”

I let out a heavy sigh, knowing where this was going. Gee Dad, way to be a dick!

“I fail to see the logic in that scenario, so if you think I’m going to take that chance, you’ve got another thing coming, young lady. Besides, this is a family vacation, and I want us all together. You want to go to college in Los Angeles, but you can’t take in a few days out in the country, this I cannot di-”

“Don’t make that comparison, Dad!”

Lots of tension here. It seems like poor Melissa can’t win. Their relationship changes as the story progresses. Well, I’d love to know your thoughts. I will be away from W.W.W. as I will be out of town for the weekend. Have a fantastic Sunday!


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20 thoughts on “Weekend Writing Warriors/#8Sunday – Melissa Can’t Win

  1. Ha! I get that dad’s thought. I have teenagers too! Great scene! Good to see your pics on FB also. 🙂

  2. Enjoy your break Frank.

    I suspect this conversation plays out in a lot of homes… Sad but true.

  3. To me, one little detail brings this argument to life: when her dad mentions the monetary value of the house. Excellent job.

  4. Been there, Frank. In fact, it never ends except I think today I’ll put an end to it. Good writing!

  5. She’s definitely got the attitude of an eighteen year old. 😉 I like it. Great snippet!

  6. Way to be difficult Melissa! I think you’ve got teenage girl down, Frank. 🙂

  7. It’s interesting to see more of their relationship. Would a Dad really talk about the price of the family home though? His concerns about a teen home alone would apply even if they had a tiny house….just felt a tad off to me to mention the price. Also, I was surprised she was 18. That’s pretty mature usually, out of high school, at least here where I live…but I’m enjoying the story, as you know! It’s been fascinating to read.

    • It’s the way Melissa’s dad is. Some dads actually talk about the price of a family home. Not all 18 year-olds are as mature as they should be.

  8. I agree with her, LA does not equal the country. If she can’t be trusted alone for 3 days, though, she’s not going to do well in college!

  9. Their conversation sounds realistic.

  10. Karen Michelle Nutt

    Realistic banter with an teen. lol I wouldn’t leave my eighteen year old at home for 3 days. 🙂

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