Posts Tagged With: 8sunday_writers

Weekend Writing Warriors – “Thanks for Nothin’!”

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The weekly 8-10 sentence blog hop is hosted by Weekend Writing Warriors. Click on the links for participation guidelines, as well as the official list of participating authors. Thank you everyone for your helpful comments last week. I would like to especially thank, Veronica Scott, for her informative feedback – thanks Veronica!

Continuing today with my YA WIP, Cruel Summer, I’ve skipped a few lines in this week’s snippet. Melissa asked her dad if she could borrow his car to take her sister out for late night waffles. Dad wouldn’t oblige on the count of a speeding ticket she got, which happened before the story began. Melissa and her dad argue, but to no avail Melissa loses. Feeling this is unfair, she let’s her feelings be known:

“Good talkin’ to ya, Dad,” I said, throwing up my hands, “thanks for nothin’!”

I spun on my heels and left his study.

“Melissa Lauren Isabel McNamara, get back here at once,” Dad retorted coldly as I was passing our pool table, his voice stinging my back like needles.

I dragged my feet towards him, the crimson burning in his eyes made my heart shudder as he stood up from his leather office chair.

“I understand your feelings of resentment because you didn’t get your way,” he said sternly. “But I have worked very hard to provide for you and your sister, ever since the day your mother’s life was taken from us, so I suggest you not channel that misguided teenage immaturity in the form of a thoughtless insult.”

 I gulped, wishing I had just left the room without mouthing back at him, but I kept my posture straight so he wouldn’t know he was getting to me.

Dad leaned forward, the anger in his eyes hitting me harder. “Thanks to me, you are fortunate to have a roof over your head and food to eat. There are countless children in this world, your age and younger, that live in such great poverty and abuse…you may wish to keep that in mind, young lady!”

Well Melissa, he kicked your butt! She should have followed her own advice indeed! Thoughts? Feedback?

Thank you for visiting my blog today, and I hope you will visit other authors participating today. I will be back to share more snippets in May, as I will be embarking on my month long voyage to South America next week! I’m very excited as I’ve never been and always wanted to go! I’m especially looking forward to Machu Picchu, Argentina and Chile!

Have a great weekend!

 

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Weekend Writing Warriors – Don’t Bother Daddy!

The weekly 8-10 sentence blog hop is hosted by Weekend Writing Warriors. Click on the links for participation guidelines, as well as the official list of participating authors.

 

I’m glad to be back after a long absence from W.W.W. More on that after the snippet. I’m offering an excerpt from my new WIP, Cruel Summer, which is a coming-of-age YA contemporary that takes place in Cincinnati.

In this snippet, Melissa approaches her dad in his study and asks why he’s not attending to Ashley, her younger sister who’s heartbroken after her boyfriend cheated on her. Dad doesn’t take kindly to being disturbed while working. Note that this is a different Melissa and Ashley, and not the ones from my other story; I just thought it would be nice to have my heroines with the same names – I dunno!

This is Melissa’s POV and creative punctuation has been used to meet the sentence limit:

Dad lifted his head up from his laptop amid his fingers clicking away happily on the keyboard. His glasses slid down to the tip of his nose as he greeted me with a lowered brow. I simply folded my arms and tapped my foot, letting him know I didn’t care if I was disturbing whatever he was working on.

“Are you, like, aware Ashley’s upstairs in tears?” I asked him.

“Are you, like, aware that I have a deadline to meet? Are you also aware I warned her about that witless impudent?”

I blinked at the annoyance shooting from his eyes into mine.

“Now I know you’re not down here to check on me, so out with it, young lady.”

You couldn’t fool my dad, he always had that weird ability to read people.

“I wanna borrow the car,” I said,”I wanna take Ashley out to Ariane’s for some waffles.”

 

Ariane’s is a fictitious diner in the story. The tension between Melissa and her dad is a subplot of the story, and it stems from the fact that Melissa wants to live her own life.

Blurb: When her younger sister starts dating a young man with a dark side, life turns upside down for Melissa. She’ll need the help from the last person she would go to – her ex-boyfriend.

Thoughts and feedback is much appreciated, keeping in mind this is a W.I.P.

So where the heck have I been? Sorry, I’ve been working two jobs since October and trying to keep up with my Rotary duties. Sadly, writing has also been on the back-burner. No matter, I’m just happy I’ve finally made some time to be with you all again. I’ll share another snippet from this story next week.

Thanks for visiting me today!

Frank

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#8Sunday – Gotta Cool This Floor Down!

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The weekly 8-10 sentence blog hop is hosted by Weekend Writing Warriors. Click on the links for participation guidelines, as well as the official list of participating authors.

More from Never Let Go. Melissa and Ashley are in a real pickle – trapped in a walled room under the watch of Emily. She’s made the floor become red-hot, and the poor teens must dance what seems like an everlasting hot foot! 

I’ve skipped a few lines in this scene to where Emily and her daughters are delighting in watching Melissa and Ashley suffer. Can they find a way to save themselves?

This is Melissa’s POV and the snippet has been formatted with creative punctuation to fit the 8-10 sentence limit:

I let out a scream rattled my ribs as I shook my right foot in the air. When my other foot couldn’t take anymore of the floor’s hot bee stinging, I shook it, but the air barely relieved the burns.

My throat burned from constant shrieking and my calves began to ache from endless hopping.

Leaping in the air with both feet, Ashley filled the air with howls with the heat wreaking havoc on her poor skin. Listening to her suffer agonizing pain ripped my heart in half, and I knew her feet couldn’t take much more punishment.

“Ge-get me off this floor,” she wailed.

I couldn’t take hearing her suffer any longer, and we needed something to protect our feet from further damage – pronto!

The red glow vanished in the floor just as I was about to strip my pants so we could stand on them, and the next thing I knew water began to spray onto the floor from a nozzle sticking out of the wall by our knees. Hissing filled the air and steam rose from the floor as the liquid hit it. As the floor cooled, we let out sharp breaths of relief as the steam left moisture on my arms and neck.

 

Well it seems as if Emily has a heart if she’s cooling the floor down, but there must be catch. And certainly those girls’ feet haven’t gotten off unscathed. More from this next week. Your feedback is much appreciated!

I will do my best to comment on everyone’s snippets, but I’m attending an intensive tai chi workshop today, and I won’t be home til later this evening. I recently took up tai chi after moving back home. I’ve actually been attending workshops all weekend (the other is related to work), hence my lack of presence on Saturday Spankings and Snippet Sunday.

I’ll likely be absent from snippet-sharing until November as life is getting in the way – again! Until then, happy reading and writing. Best wishes to everyone who’s participating in NaNoWriMo!

 

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